Often-and-on relationships end when the decision to take it a step further doesn’t necessarily produce a more lasting committed result. This is often caused by lack of understanding of each other and the inability to effectively reach a compromise with each other’s differences.
As far-fetched as it sounds, the five love languages are core elements that would enable a better understanding of one’s partner in a relationship, according to the shrinks. Now because no two human beings are alike, the key is to understand which of the five you fall under and utilise it in your relationship.
Word of affirmation. For some, all they require is those encouraging words- the compliments, the affirmation, the booster. They don’t need gifts or affection, just appreciation. Once or twice or several times as much as you can, throw in a little appreciation. For example, if she made you a sumptuous meal, and you just accept it like it is her duty, without as much as saying thank you, and peradventure this is her love language, she will not only feel unloved by you, there will also be a form of resistance in the relationship because she will always feel unappreciated. It applies for the men. Yes, they have feelings too and tend to feel unappreciated most times.
Act of service. A lot of people take “action speaks louder than words” much more practical and literal than even their partners. A simple act of help around the house when she is doing chores or aiding her to carry the grocery bag or even her bag tends to make her feel loved if this is her love language. No matter how many times you tell her you love her, be it every minute or hour, she will still feel you don’t love her when she is straining herself out and you’re laying about watching TV.
Receiving gift. This one is easy and can be easily related within Nigeria. A lot of women have been categorized material for possessing this love language. Even men have gone on to make this a thing once they venture into a relationship; even when it isn’t their partner’s love language. Thing is the people with this type of love language express their love more with gifts. It doesn’t always have to be on the receiving end. Most times than normal, the people with the love language tend to spoil their {male} partners with gift items as well. To them, it is just another means of communication.
Quality time. If your spouse’s love language is quality time, giving him or her your undivided attention is one of the best ways you can show your love. Some men pride themselves on being able to watch television, read a magazine, and listen to their wives, all at the same time. That is an admirable trait, but it is not speaking the love language of quality time. Instead, you must turn off the TV, lay the magazine down, look into your mate’s eyes, and listen and interact. To your spouse, 20 minutes of your undivided attention – listening and conversing – is like a 20-minute refill of his or her love tank. Men, if you really want to impress your wife, the next time she walks into the room while you are watching a sporting event, put the television on mute and don’t take your eyes off her as long as she’s in the room. If she engages you in conversation, turn the TV off and give her your undivided attention. You will score a thousand points and her love tank will be overflowing.
Physical touch. We have long known the emotional power of physical touch. That’s why we pick up babies and touch them tenderly. Long before an infant understands the meaning of the word love, he or she feels loved by physical touch. In relationships, the love language of physical touch includes everything from putting a hand on your mate’s shoulder as you walk by, touching his or her leg as you’re driving together, and holding hands while you’re walking to kissing, embracing and sexual intercourse. If physical touch is your spouse’s primary love language, nothing communicates love more clearly than for you to take the initiative to reach out and touch your mate.
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